Around the Web | Feelings and Faith

Around the Web

Christine has been published on Daily Mail, The Huffington Post, Parenting.com, Babble, Cosmopolitan, Good Housekeeping, Romper, Your Tango, Elle, Marie Claire, Esquire, Redbook, Scary Mommy, For Every Mom, Positively Positive, Club Mid, To Save A Life, Elephant Journal, Momalode, The Mighty, On Coming Alive, Sammiches and Psych Meds and more.


Recovering meth addict reveals how she turned her life around after turning to drugs when she was raped at age 19 to become a happy, healthy mother to three children.

Featured On: Daily Mail


A recovering addict has bared all in a powerful new essay detailing how she spiraled into drug addiction and self-harm after being a victim of rape – and how she made it out alive. Writer and recovering addict Christine Suhan, 31, lives in Waxhaw, North Carolina, with her husband Kyle and their three sons, Rylen, [Read more…]


METH ADDICTION NEARLY TOOK MY LIFE

Featured On: Elle


I once spent an entire day crouched down on my bedroom floor holding a flashlight and picking through my carpet. An entire day. I can’t even tell you how many little rocks, crumbs, pieces of dirt, and granules of salt I ate hoping to find the specks of crystal meth I was convinced I had dropped the night [Read more…]


When I Tell You I’m an Alcoholic …

Featured On: Babble


Yes, that’s right; I’m an alcoholic. But that alone is not the whole story. I’ve been sober now for nearly seven straight years, although I’ve technically been in recovery for over 10. Like many recovering alcoholics, my journey was interrupted by a few relapses along the way — a reality, but certainly not a requirement, [Read more…]


Mothering While Chronically Ill: How I’ve Helped My Children Adjust

Featured On: Parenting.com


Mothering while chronically ill is excruciatingly difficult, but nothing is worse than knowing how desperate my children are to see me well. “Mommy, do you remember when we lived at our old house and you weren’t sick all the time?” my 5-year-old asked sweetly while his bright-blue, puppy dog eyes met mine. He looked sad. [Read more…]


Adjusting My Lens: Shifting Out of Survival Back Into Life

Featured On: The Huffington Post


I dreamt of him last night. It’s been a while since he’s haunted my sleep, but time hasn’t erased any piece of him from my mind. He felt so real. I woke up, gasping for air. My heart was beating so fast, I thought it might burst through my chest. I hugged the pillow next [Read more…]


After Having 3 Boys, I Desperately Grieve for the Girl I Never Had

Featured On: Good Housekeeping


I never expected to be a mother. A long history of battling anorexia took the possibility of children off my radar, but I ended up having three boys, whom I love with every ounce of my being. But, without a daughter, my family and my heart feel incomplete. I’ve spent what seems like a lifetime [Read more…]


Why The Victims Of The Brussels Attacks Deserve Our Attention, Not The Attackers

Featured On: Romper


As the names of the victims from yesterday’s Brussels attacks are slowly released, I can’t help but remember all of the reasons I fell in love with Brussels so much in the first place. I lived there for a short time more than a decade ago and it was, as I remember, a wonderfully diverse [Read more…]


It’s Not Just A Uterus

Featured On: Scary Mommy


I didn’t want to wake up this morning. Not in the usual my body hurts, I didn’t get enough sleep and I’m not yet ready to deal with three screaming toddlers kind of way. I didn’t want to wake up because last night I dreamt I was pregnant with my baby girl. Yes, I am [Read more…]


Why We’re Moving Back To Europe, Despite The Terrorist Attacks

Featured On: Romper


When I share my desire to move my family abroad with friends, I’m often met with a look of confusion. My husband, although supportive, still doesn’t understand the depth of my desire to give my family a life he can’t imagine. I don’t think anyone who hasn’t lived abroad can understand the deep-rooted passion for [Read more…]


This Is What It TRULY Means To Love Someone Unconditionally

Featured On: Your Tango


Til death do us part, when there’s more sickness than health. Yesterday, as I stood in the freezer aisle of the grocery store gazing at a ridiculously overpriced package of chocolate ice cream bars, I felt my heart sink into my stomach. I don’t visit that particular grocery store often, and when I do it’s [Read more…]


Why I No Longer Believe My ‘Happiness Is a Choice’

Featured On: The Mighty


Lately it seems my social media news feeds are filled with photographs and memes conveying the message that happiness is a choice. Some I’ve seen today are: “Happiness is a choice, not a result. Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy.” “Happiness is a choice, you decide.” “Happiness: it’s up to [Read more…]

Christine Suhan with Son While Jumping on Trampoline

On Becoming A Sentimental Mom

Featured On: Scary Mommy


This morning I used the drop-off line at my sons’ preschool for the first time. As I drove off, I watched my 3-year-old put his backpack on, grab his teacher’s hand, and wave goodbye. It was a long, lingering goodbye. He was wearing a proud smile that lit up his face as he stood there [Read more…]


Dear Mama: You Are Enough

Featured On: Sammiches and Psyche Meds


Dear mama, You are enough. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been a mom for two hours, two days, two years or two decades. You are enough. It doesn’t matter if you stay home with the kids all day, work out of the house or work from home. You are enough. If doesn’t matter if your [Read more…]


What it Means to Mother Children in a World Full of Terrorism and Not Take the Easy Way Out

Featured On: For Every Mom


Last night, I sat at the edge of my five year old’s bed and watched his face as he listened to his daddy read him the first chapter of The Chronicles of Narnia series. My husband read of a land far away; a land with magical creatures, mythical beasts, and lots of treasure. My son, [Read more…]


Does Any Of This Really Matter?

Featured On: Scary Mommy


I’ve always been a deep thinker. I consider it one of my character defects although at times it does come in handy. Some might label my thinking problem anxiety. Others like to call it over-analyzing. I use those terms (and others) interchangeably, as they all seem to adequately describe the nature of this malady. Subscribe! [Read more…]


Falling into Fall: Acceptance, Mindfulness & Living in the Now

Featured On: Elephant Journal


Last night, after tucking my three toddlers into bed, I headed outside for a night time jump. Since purchasing the trampoline this past Christmas, my four-year-old has made a habit of sneaking downstairs and begging mommy or daddy to take him outside for a night time jump. I rarely decline the invitation, as the starry [Read more…]


A World so Different From Mine

Featured On: Elephant Journal


My heart hurts. I turn on the radio, and my heart hurts. I scroll through my Facebook newsfeed, and my heart hurts. I watch the interactions that take place at my children’s school, and my heart hurts. My heart hurts for myself, for the people I love and for the world we live in. My [Read more…]


I’m Not Ashamed of My Mental Illnesses

Featured On: Cosmopolitan


Shame is my brain’s most dangerous weapon. And silence makes my shame come alive. I stayed silent for far too long. For years I let shame wipe its dirty little hands all over me, wrapping me up tightly in its arms. Its taunting voice whispered in my ear. “You are worthless. You are sick. There is something wrong [Read more…]


Why I’m Too Scared to Stay Silent About Suicide

Featured On: The Mighty


A friend reached out this morning for advice. A dear friend of hers died by suicide. “What do you say when someone takes their own life?” she asked. It could have been me.  My friend and I talked briefly about her friend. I had never met him; I didn’t know him. But at the same [Read more…]


I have Irritable Bowel Syndrome

Featured On: Cosmopolitan


On my third date with the man who is now my husband, I sharted. I farted and shit came out. We were at a Chinese buffet; dangerous territory for someone with severe irritable bowel syndrome (IBS). My husband claims he fell in love with me the moment I walked out of the bathroom and casually [Read more…]


I’ll Always Regret Driving Drunk

Featured On: Good Housekeeping


I regret driving drunk. I didn’t at the time. I wasn’t capable of feeling regret back then. I wasn’t capable of feeling anything. My alcoholism had gutted me from the inside out. Nothing was left but a shell of skin draped over a dark, hollow cavity. I was dead inside and void of feeling. I drove drunk [Read more…]


Sex After Rape – When Rape Makes Sex Painful and Unenjoyable

Featured On: Marie Claire


Last night, I cried myself to sleep. I watched my husband as he hastily put his clothes back on and stormed out of the room. He was angry with me, again. The tear that had begun to form in the corner of my eye dropped softly to my pillowcase as the door slammed shut. “I’m [Read more…]


When All Else Fails Just Be Still

Featured On: Club Mid on Scary Mommy


My head can be a scary place to live some days. Yesterday was one of them. The depression fog had settled in and clouded my every thought. In the midst of a gorgeous summer day, the world looked dark. The sweet sound of my kids’ laughter just sounded like noise—loud, obnoxious noise. The connections with [Read more…]


Quit Saying “Everything Happens For A Reason”

Featured On: For Every Mom


Have you ever found yourself, in the midst of unimaginable grief, pain, heartache, or despair, wondering how you are going to make it through another day? Wondering where your next breath is going to come from? Your world has crumbled beneath you and has left you feeling shattered, empty, and hopeless. And then a well meaning [Read more…]

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